Reason #2 – Why I Hate Not Having a BF


I’ll be the first to admit it: I hate shoveling. And for all the reasons you expect. I’m weak. I’m lazy. I hate it. I’m not good at it. I have no clue on how to clean off a car and shovel around it properly. But yet, winter after winter I find myself doing it. Why? Because I have NO choice. I’m an independent (AND SINGLE) woman.  Fuck. Me. I mean, yay me! Hear me roar and all the bullshit.

I’m almost positive that a big burly strong man would have my car clean and out of its buried spot in a third of the time it takes me. Probably even a fourth. I go out there with no plan whatsoever. It must look like I’m having a seizure when I’m cleaning off my car. Do you know how long it took me to figure out to clean the top of my car off before cleaning off my windshield? YEARS! I used to make my windshield all clean and scraped off and then used to clean the top of my car. Which would then all slide onto the windshield and hood. The things I just cleaned off. Fuuuuuuuuuuuck.

Seriously, every (bad) winter storm I’m out there in my embarrassing get up mumbling to myself about how I really really really wish I had a boyfriend so he could be doing this right now. And it’s honestly because I’m so bad at it. I would even help him. Anything (!!) so that I wouldn’t have to do it alone. But, I’ve learned to do a lot alone (and I’m not trying to be X rated or funny here) and I should just shut up and do it. No more mumbly grumblies about it.

Thank God for SUV’s. My whole front left tire was buried up to my hip in snow. So instead of shoveling that out for the next three hours, I instead gunned the Escape out of its spot (backing up mind you) and moved it to a spot which was already shoveled out (apartment complex. Not Southie. haha). Props to my sister for thinking of that. Because see? I wouldn’t have thought of that. I was about to go out there and start shoveling around the car etc. Thank God I talked to Karen before I went out there. Reason # 5,642 I love having an older sister!!

So the news is telling me we got about 17″ in the ‘borough. What about you? Snow totals where you are please!


6 thoughts on “Reason #2 – Why I Hate Not Having a BF

  1. I have a BF and still had to do it all myself. So what does that say about me? Wait, don’t answer. I’ll answer for you…..”SUCKA!”

    The Weymouth ghetto got 18″.

    Headin’ to Worcester tonight to see Phish. Tomorrow too. Wish me luck! Little asshole hippie fans probably don’t know how to drive (their parents’ SUVs) in the snow.

  2. hahahaa!!!

    First of all, being big and burly (especially around the middle), I can say it doesn’t help.

    I also hate shoveling. I too clean around the car, and then clean the roof off….whump right on my driveway. WTF!! Yesterday I had to pause often to catch my breath and did it in 3 easy installments, with hour long breaks in between. I am very sore today and I have a snowblower – well half a snowblower…..I haven’t gotten around to fixing the other blade.

    BTW, my “helper” lasted 3 minutes….even when I offered to triple her reward, but then she made me an egg sandwhich, so….ok.

    I must admit that I love 4 wheel drive and most years shovel a narrow path to the car and then gun it through, making Nancy park single file until the snow melts. F*ck cleaning all around the car…..the girls can hold on to the car so they don’t slip.

    Bottom line…..being a guy doesn’t make it easier. Plus, lets face it….wouldn’t you just roll over, look at him and say “cmon, do we REALLY need to drive anywhere today? Bow chigga chang chang!!!”

  3. Well, if we’re fantasizing here – then my mystery burly boyfriend would’ve had it shoveled and cleaned off before I even woke up. Then he’d be making me breakfast in bed. And THEN he’d be saying to ME “We don’t have to go anywhere today right??” Because yeah…I’m that good.


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