Mummy Dearest

Oh gosh. There were so many titles I could’ve used for an Egyptian themed post: Mummy Dearest (my fave. Hence why I named the post that.), Talk Like an Egyptian, and Cairotastrophe.

The only problem: I’ve been to busy/lazy to even form a coherent thought about what is going on over there. What I do know is that those protesters are NO JOKE! They are there day and night. Very dedicated to this cause. On both sides.  Of course some folks have gotten nasty. And by nasty, I mean violent.

This leads me to my title: Mummy Dearest.  Some protesters broke into Cairo’s Egyptian Museum (Clever name by the way. NOT!), or forced their way in, or murdered the guards at the front door…I have no idea. Lazy…remember? Anywho, they got in and ripped the heads off of two mummies. AND they were close to getting into the King Tut stuff.

What did those mummies do to you, asshole Egyptian protesters? Didn’t they ever see this?!

In all seriousness, the mummies are a great part of Egyptian history.  What was the purpose of damaging them? Was Mubarak going to go, “Oh Shit, they really mean it then. I better pack, update my Facebook status and leave ASAP. Peace!” NO! Leave the damn mummies alone. You can’t easily fix that shit you know!!

Instead, do what we Americans do: Loot.  Forget the artifacts! Unless King Tut is wearing Air Jordans and watching a Flat Screen TV… we wouldn’t look twice.

Also, Egypt: Why all the hate? You hate Americans now? Really? Get in line. If you want us to help though, it would be nice if you called once in a while, and, oh yeah, didn’t beat the crap out of our media.  LEAVE ANDERSON COOPER ALONE!!!!! Wait, now that I think about it, how fast can FoxNews get their talking head, Sarah Palin (soon to be a Registered Trademark. Or not . Dummies can’t even sign the paperwork!!), over there? Hey, as long as you don’t touch a hair on Richard Engel’s head, I’m cool. I loves me some Richard Engel. Yummy Mummy! Ha! See what I did there?? Ahem.

I did have a couple of other things I wanted to blog about, but maybe this isn’t the appropriate time. I mean, how could I after I have everyone watching my favorite Bert and Ernie sketch OF ALL TIME?!  So enjoy, everyone!

Team Coop!! Whoop!


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