Small Minded Soccer Moms

I saw the movie mother! tonight.

I won’t be reviewing the movie.


To the small minded soccer moms in the same theater as me (during a 4:50pm showing):

I’m sorry you don’t know what an allegory is, nor a metaphor, nor an artistic symbol.

You must’ve read that Robert Frost poem and thought that man was just taking a long stroll in the snow.

Anyway, the same phony intellects that LOVED Inception (hated it! A dream within a dream within a dream within a dream? Fuck you, Nolan) after hearing about glowing reviews, are the same phonies who saw something about this movie getting an F and decided way before showtime that they disliked this movie.

Enough to cackle and boo during quiet scenes with low sounding dialog. Grown ass women, whom I saw outside the theater as one declared, “Sharknado was a better movie!”

Seriously, I hope you choke on your Cheesecake Factory dinners so that we can harvest your organs for the actual smart people.

Next time, go see the LEGO movie. That’s more your speed.


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