Make a New Plan, Stan (Lee)!

I’m constantly wondering how I can meet guys.  I haven’t been on a date in a dog’s age (whatever that length of time is….) and I’m just annoyed by the whole thing. Look, I know I’m no Beauty Contest winner (collect $10) but I’m okay…and I’m funny…and smart…and have a great personality.  Oh shit, I’m fuckered.

Last week, after watching The Walking Dead, I started watching Comic Book Men for the first time. I loved it!! I loved it so much I decided to catch up on the show On Demand. And honestly, I’m totally attracted to these guys. I LOVE when men get excited and giddy about comic books and toys. I can’t explain it. Walter is my favorite.  But before I was able to jump in my car and head on down to NJ, I found out he was married. WTF!! Wicked pissed about that.

Hmm. So I started thinking…. YES about how to meet guys. I needed a plan on how to meet guys. Specifically guys who like comics and toys… And it came to me:  COMIC CON!!

Listen, I know NOTHING about Comic Con. I thought there was only ONE Comic Con is California every year. But guess what? There are Comic Cons all over the place. And one short Google Search for “Comic Con Boston 2012” got me the answer to my question. Yes, there is a Boston Comic Con this year, and I haven’t missed it AND it’ s not that far away! Woohoo!

So you might be saying “JMo, what about the Disney D23 Expo you’ve gone to twice already and you haven’t met anyone there, right?” (Look, just pretend you asked that okay?) My answer would have to be “Yeah but all the cute guys there were gay!” And it was true.  Forget about Tink… think Twink!! (My sister won’t get that. K – DON’T LOOK THAT UP OKAY? TRUST ME. I’ll explain it to you another time.)

So D23 was a bust. But at Comic Con there has to be single guys looking for girls right? Maybe? I’m going to try it out. I’ve been telling folks about my plan and have been asked twice “Are you going to dress up in costume?”

Dude, WTF. Seriously. No!! The only costume that a woman should wear to a geek fest like that is Slave Princess Lea and um, yeah…JMo can’t pull that off. At all. So then what is left? Should I go as a Wookie? Or Jem? Ooooh, Jem. She is truly outrageous…

Anyway…no costume. Just me. Trolling Boston Comic Con for dudes. Can you even imagine?  This should be more fodder for this blog if nothing else.

Hey, wish me luck. And if you plan on being at Boston’s Comic Con and you are a single straight dude who is taller than 5’9″…let me know!

Oh a few criteria: I prefer Star Wars over Star Trek. Like immensely.  I truly know nothing about ST but did see the Star Trek movie that JJ did and that’s only because Zachary Quinto is HOT HOT HOT!! Spock me!!

I think that is my only criteria. Must Love Star Wars.

Who wants to bet I (Empire) strike (s Back) out at Boston Comic Con? HAHA!!

xojmo

Update: I was just told by a comic book geek that comic book geeks think they can get with porn star looking chicks and booth babes. Is this true? What the hell? I’m so screwed. Listen, you sweaty 34 year old who still lives at home playing D&D in the basement…You’re not gonna get those chicks. You just aren’t. So you better just take me out to Chili’s and like it, okay?

I Know the Secret to Disney|Pixar’s “Brave” – SPOILER ALERT!

Let me start off by saying a couple of things:

I’ve known the “secret” to Disney/Pixar’s Brave since last August (D23 Expo).  I will say that the person who told me, did so by complete accident, thinking I already knew (more on that to come). I will also say that the person who told me does work for Disney.

Since August I have scoured the internet looking for this “secret” and have yet to find it. I offered the scoop to an unauthorized Disney fan page/blog, and was shown no interest. Um, okay. Now, I have a blog, but while I have intermittently written about Disney topics, it’s not a Disney-only-centric blog. I’m not even sure if anyone will even see this, or care for that matter. BUT, I feel like since this has been kept under wraps for so long….it’s gotta be something that Disney/Pixar didn’t necessarily want us (the fans) to know. But now I’m letting the world now. AND IF for some reason this picks up any traction or interest, I would just like to say that before 8:39pm on February 23, 2012 – this was nowhere else in print. I’m the first to talk about it. So kudos to me!! Wheeee!!

JMo’s got the scoop!! Oh yeah!

While at the 2nd D23 Expo in Anaheim last August, I met a lovely person (no gender or name to protect the innocent) who works for Disney but was not working at the Expo.  Since this person was alone, my sister and I would meet up with them during random times during the day. Check out different sessions, etc. Eat lunch. You know at the copious places to eat at the Anaheim Convention Center. Otherwise known as “Wait in line for an hour for a hot dog and then sit on the floor since there are no chairs/tables anywhere.”

While separated from said person, my sister and I went to see the Brave break out discussion. It truly made me look forward to this movie. It’s visually stunning and the main character is a curly red headed badass princess. Woo! You go girl!

Plug: DISNEY|PIXAR’S BRAVE OPENING IN THEATERS ON JUNE 22ND!

Ok ok, on to the spoilery part. So after the talk was over we met up with person who works for Disney. They asked how it went and we started talking about the movie. The bear, the suitors, the Witch.

And then it just kind of slipped out of their mouth.

“Oh yeah. And the Witch’s curse that turns her mother into a bear.”

Say what now?

Well the proverbial cat was out of the bag. Or in this case, the bear. Out of the cave.

Now I don’t know if the Witch turns the Queen into “THE” bear or “a” bear. And if you’ve seen the trailer I think you know what I mean by “THE” bear. We shall see.

But what I do know is that this particular plot point has been written NOWHERE until now. I assume there is a reason why Disney and Pixar wanted to keep it from us. But no longer. I have told you. You’re welcome. 

It’s even carefully worded (and hidden of course) in Disney’s own words – part of their description of the movie:

“Merida’s actions inadvertently unleash chaos and fury in the kingdom, and when she turns to an eccentric With for help, she is granted an ill-fated wish.  The ensuing peril forces Merida to harness all of her skills and resources … to undo a beastly curse before it’s too late, discovering the meaning of true bravery.”

A beastly curse? Well it surely is a beastly curse if your ill-fated wish to the Witch turns your mom into a freakin’ bear!

So there. I’ve sat on this for months, but since I’m a complete Disney nerd, I’m letting it slip. For all you other nerds out there.

And for those of you who hate it when I blog Disney stuff, suck it up!! I’ll be back to bitching and moaning in no time!

Always let your conscience be your guide,

xojmo